• MissVaniaSpeaks/Successful Relationships

How to Stop Dating a Married Man

1. Do a reality check:

Come out of the world of extramarital affairs and come back to reality. Think about how bad influence this relationship is. Think about what your life was and what it has become. Are you happy from within? Is this what you want, claiming your right on someone married to some other woman?


2. Believe in yourself:

Many women get into relationships with married men thinking that it is what they deserve. They subconsciously think that they are not going to find someone else and try to adjust to the situation. Such women convince themselves that they are in love while they could just be in love with the idea of being in a relationship. Believe in yourself. Tell yourself that the best is yet to come and you do not need to compromise.


3. Think about your future:

You are in a relationship that is doomed. Your future is at a standstill. Your youth is coming to an end and you are still unsure who you are going to spend the rest of your life with. You let go of suitable men because you are hanging onto this relationship.


4. Look for the void:

At times people get into relationships to fill up some other void. Identify the void that is eating your life up. Is it attention? Money? Love? Do you need to endure the pain of being the other woman to fill the void?

Think about how those voids can be filled without a married man in the picture.


5. Figure why you are always lonely:

Holidays are the times you spend with your loved ones. It is a time of joy and happiness and is cherished for life. Did your lover spend his holidays with you or his family? When the world was going around publicly celebrating, you were left alone, even though you had your lover to celebrate it with.


6. You are his mistress. You are the other woman in a married couple’s life. You can never take the place of his wife. He will never have kids with you. All you are doing is unwillingly breaking a family when the man is at fault.


7. Give him a pregnancy scare:

He is going to tell you to abort the child because he cannot leave his family. His reaction will determine where you stand in his life. And once he does so, you should not think twice before walking out of this hell. You are the one who will have to make the sacrifice because of a situation he put you in.


8. Ask him to file for divorce:

Do not threaten to leave him. He has prepared himself for this long time before it popped into your mind. He will talk you out of it. Ask him to file for a divorce. Tell him you can’t continue going on like this. He is never going to do it, though he may keep on asking you time.


9. Stop lying to yourself and everyone else:

Going behind a man’s wife and kids for your affair isn’t worth it. You have to constantly lie to yourself and to your near and dear ones to keep this relationship going. And you cannot declare your relationship in public, it has to be a secretive affair.

There are so many secrets you have to keep and for what? A relationship that has no future. You cannot go out in public, cannot introduce him to your friends.

He will never acknowledge you as his girlfriend.


10. Think about the kids:

Think about what impact this news will have on the kids. They are not prepared for such a situation. Would they not hate you? Can you take hatred of kids, so to say? They cannot handle the trauma of having divorced parents and custody issues.


11. Tell the wife:

The wife has the right to know who she married. Telling her will put you in a bad light but you cannot expect anything else. She needs to know because her ignorance can encourage the man to do it again with someone else. Telling her will lift a heavy weight off your chest. He will probably not pull you in his life and will perhaps even bad mouth you. But the plus point is that you will no more be tied to that man.


12. Sever all ties:

Free yourself from this affair. Tell him to never contact you again. Block his number and delete his contact. Block him from your social media accounts and you’re your common friends not to have you both together. Threaten to inform the wife if he tries to reach you.


13. Contact an ex:

Having a friendly conversation with your ex reminds you how a real relationship felt like. It may not have ended on good terms but it was real. You will remember your old self again. Contacting your ex is just an attempt you save bits of yourself and not rekindle any old romance.


14. Tell your best friend:

Don’t think about all the judging looks she will give you. In the end, she will support you and hold you together when all of this is over. You will need her the most when it all comes down crashing.


15. Get back to your old life:

You have been leading a secretive life and must have lost contact with your old friends. Reconnect with lost ones and get your life back. He is not going to like this because it will expose your relationships’ vulnerability.

Go on dates and meet new people. Who knows where you find someone.


It may sound painful at first, but it is not worth investing your time and life on someone who is already taken. Unless you are also in it for the fun part, it is best to end this affair as soon as you can.
















Source: https://www.bonobology.com

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