• MissVaniaSpeaks/Successful Relationships

17 Ways To Get Out Of The Friendzone

1. Don’t appear too needy.

To get out of the friendzone quickly, stop acting all needy. When you are in a position wherein you constantly call or text them, there are chances that you might be taken for granted. Stop acting all desperate. Stop initiating things and make sure you don’t appear too needy. Create an impression that can baffle people, not one that doesn’t get attention.

2. Distance yourself.

If you have already told them multiple times how you feel about them, maybe now it’s time that you stop doing that. It is important that they know how you feel if after that, they do not want to take the relationship further, it’s their choice. It is going to affect you badly, so it’s better that you distance yourself from them, for your own well-being.

Remember, distancing does not mean you stalk them.

3. Make him/her believe that you like someone else.

Now that you have distanced yourself, make sure you let them know that you are not interested in them anymore. Make them believe that you are into someone else now. Two things can happen – either they have feelings for you and come running back or they don’t care and you know where you stand. No matter what happens, you don’t lose your self-respect.

4. Make them feel jealous.

If he/she actually likes you and has started thinking of you as a friend because of some of your actions, this might work. Jealousy is a tool which, when used right, can work wonders. Let them know you are seeing someone who is clearly better than your previous choice. Drop-in indirect hints and see the fire coming up. If they are into you, this will work.

5. Behave as if you’re really busy.

The major problem with people who are friendzoned is that they do not value themselves. Don’t reach there on time, don’t receive their calls in the first ring, don’t be available all the time. Set your priorities. Work for more important things in life and even if you don’t have anything, behave as if you’re really busy.

6. If you are friendzoned, be the friend.

Sometimes, we don’t understand the value of friendship itself. It is where everything begins. Realize that it is important that you be there for them in their tough times, if they want you as a friend, then so be it. You cannot force your emotions on someone else. If they are really into you, they would want to move things ahead gradually. If not, acceptance is the key. Bring back the best of your friendship in the relationship.

7. Respect their choices.

It is important that you respect their choices, no matter what. If they are seeing someone else, it is no use talk bad about that person. Don’t badmouth them or their partner in front of your social groups, it only shows you as a negative person. Learn to respect them and their choices. True love lies in respect.

8. Stop overthinking.

You need to, right away, stop victimizing yourself. Stop making yourself the object of pity. No crime has been done. Getting friendzoned is no big deal. Please stop obsessing over it, it will drain out your energy. Do not be that hopeless romantic who just can’t stop singing sad songs and hogging on tubs of ice-cream.

9. Understand that they don’t owe you anything.

Remember, what you do as a friend for them is supposed to be selfless. You should not be expecting favours in return. Friendship is when you can rely on one another without worrying about anything else. If you are expecting favours in return to what you do for them, tell them that beforehand.

10. Stop expecting.

Expectations hurt the most. If you constantly expect them to call you or text you or shower you with the attention that you keep on giving them, you are going to get disappointed. Chances are they don’t even spare a minute to think of you. Why waste your time on them? It is best that you stop expecting, if you feel like giving out love and positivity, do that. But don’t expect to receive the same.

11. Don’t make your decisions based on their likes and dislikes.

Remember, love and career and life are not the same things. What stream to choose for higher secondary education or what job to take should be based on what prospects can you get not on what your crush has decided to do in his/her life. Such decisions can make you regret later on. Not just the big ones, smaller decisions like where to go and what to wear should also be your own choice rather than your crush’s.

12. Don’t flirt creepily.

Flirting can either be a turn on or a complete turn off depending on how you do it. Chances are you messed up when you started flirting making yourself seem unattractive. Don’t flirt if you are not good at it. While flirting, the person you are flirting with should be blushing looking at the phone screen or in person. Then, you are successful. It is all about words. If you are not good at it, it is better to not do it, rather than doing it creepily.

13. Stop being possessive about them.

It is okay to be protective of them at times, but it is not okay to be possessive about them. It can make them feel uncomfortable and it can also lead to them pushing you away further. No matter what your intentions are, good or bad, you have to give them the space to make their own mistakes and learn from them.

14. Make sure you are not being taken advantage of.

With all of this in mind, also take care of the fact that your vulnerabilities are not taken advantage of. Make sure they are not using you for their own benefits. Do not be a back up plan.

Sometimes, we hope for things to move forward, and get ready for anything and everything only to drown in a pool of tears later. Don’t let that happen. Make conscious decisions and don’t flow in the river of love without a swimsuit.

15. Stay away if it gets too painful.

It can be difficult to stay in a zone where you are not too special and you see someone else taking the place you wanted to be in. If you have already expressed your feelings and you see them with someone else, it is a clear sign that they are not into you. That can be very hurtful for you and you might lose hold over emotions. So, it is better to stay away until you heal. If you cannot tolerate it, if it makes you feel jealous, it is okay. Embrace your emotions and take a break. Divert yourself, give time to your hobbies.

16. Don’t lose hope.

We know how hard it is to get out of the friendzone, but remember this is not the end of the world. It is okay to be considered a friend. It is normal to not have feelings reciprocated. The trick is to never lose hope. Perhaps, someday you’ll find someone who’ll value you for who you are. Someone way better than your current love. True love will find its way in your life, sooner or later.

17. Work on yourself and your goals.

While you are trying to escape the friendzone, start working on things that matter the most. Work on your body and practice self-love. Start making goals and work towards them. Don’t let one rejection lower your morale. Make sure you start improving on your mental and physical health.

Love will come to you in one way or the other!

Source: https://www.bonobology.com

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