10 Things To Do In A New Relationship
1. Add Variety to Your Dates.
Don’t see each other in only one context. Instead of the usual Netflix-and-chill scenario, take walks together, scheduling lunch dates, and enjoying the company of friends and colleagues. It can be illuminating to see your partner navigate different situations and relationships. Maybe they’re always nice to you, but they turn competitive around friends. These things are good to know before you become too involved.
2. Maintain Independence.
Spending every waking moment with a new partner puts us at risk of losing ourselves, and our friends, too. In the most long-lasting relationships, partners maintain their sense of independence. See family and friends, continue to exercise and work hard, and prioritize alone-time. Balance is important.
3. Watch Out for Red Flags.
Ignoring red flags only prolongs the inevitable demise of the relationship. If, say, your new love criticizes you, makes plans and repeatedly cancels, you catch them in a lie, or you see them treating other people poorly, they're probably not worth investing in for the long-term.
4. Respect Yourself.
Treating yourself well sets an example of how your partner should treat you and signifies what you will and will not tolerate. There's nothing wrong with being principled, knowing yourself, and being yourself. Do things for yourself, too, such as taking time for self-care.
5. Communicate Often and Well.
Say what you mean and mean what you say, be direct and considerate, choose battles wisely, treat your partner well, and avoid destructive things like yelling, insulting, and judging. The start of a relationship can lay the foundation for the future, so pay attention to how you communicate. If you don’t have the skills to communicate effectively, get professional help or a self-help book and work on this vital relationship characteristic.
6. Don’t Blow Up Their Phone.
Keep things reciprocal and gradual. If they initiated plans the first time, you can initiate the second time and so on, but don’t always be the person texting first, calling, and initiating plans.
7. Don't Skip the Sexual Health Conversation.
If you aren’t comfortable asking them about STDs and STIs or telling them about your own sexual health, it’s not yet the time to have sex. Wait until you're both comfortable having an honest conversation about health before becoming intimate.
8. Wait Until You're Comfortable to Be Intimate.
Having one partner who is ready is not enough. The amount of time to wait before having sex differs for every couple. There is no such thing as too soon or too long. The right time is when both people are 100% ready.
9. Be Flexible.
Try to remain open to trying new foods and participating in new activities and don’t discuss topics that are controversial or depressing. The start of a new relationship ought to be light and fun, and things can become more serious with time.
10. Don't Denigrate Yourself.
If you have things in your past that you consider less than ideal, for example, if you just got fired or your previous partner cheated on you, then find a way to discuss or disclose these things in a positive light. Rather than saying "I got dumped because my ex wanted someone better-looking, say something like My ex and I weren’t a good match, and this became more evident with time.”
A new relationship is a lot of fun, and you should enjoy it. But also, don’t ignore your own needs or any red flags.
In the early phases of a relationship, people are often wearing rose-colored glasses. They minimize or ignore their partner’s faults and exaggerate or only see their partner’s positive attributes.
Kepp this in mind at the beginning of any relationship!